Leaning Out of Toxicity and Into Positivity

We’ve all heard the word toxic which can be used to describe many people, places, or things throughout our lives. If you look up toxicity in the dictionary you will find the definition to explain it as: “ The quality of being toxic or poisonous.”

Let’s face it, we have all been and will continue to be presented with toxic people, places, and things at some point or another, it’s how we respond to these that can make or break us.

Recently, I made a decision to lean out of a toxic family relationship in order to lean into more positivity in my life. This was not an easy decision for me to make, but it has definitely been a wonderful growth and learning experience. This relationship was something that had been mostly toxic for a greater part of my life and with God’s help, I have been able to see things more clearly now than I’ve ever been able to.

Toxic relationships can consist of many things: Passive-Aggressiveness, Manipulation, Anger Outbursts, Guilt Trips, Ignoring/Excluding, Constant Criticism, Always looking for something to be mad at the other person for, Incessant button pushing in order to get a rise out of the other person, Not taking responsibility for one’s actions in the relationship, Lack of encouragement, and Turning things around on the other person to make all of the issues their fault. Any of these sound familiar to you? If so, here are some things to think about and try in order to make the situation better or break free from it temporarily or long-term.

First, consider how long this has been going on and with whom or what. Has it been more rewarding or more draining and stressful to engage with this person or in this situation? How do you feel after you  have talked with this person or participated in the situation? Do you find yourself having to jump through hoops and perform a circus act in order for things to go smoothly? Do you dread the encounter or conversation? Do you feel like you have to walk on egg shells or consistently navigate and re-navigate this person or situation? How has this affected your health and happiness? How has it affected other people and areas of your life?

After assessing the above, it’s important to ask yourself how much more energy you want to put into it and take away from other people and things that could be adding more positivity to your life. 

If you feel the relationship or situation is worth more energy, then you can try talking to the person or going about the situation differently than you have in the past such as writing a letter. If you have already tried doing this one or more times, then maybe it is time to try distancing yourself or seeking guidance from someone else about the person or situation.

The bottom line is that it really is OK to lean out and separate yourself from people or situations that do not help to create positivity and peace in your life. Nothing or no one is worth being in a consistent state of turmoil.

Life is short, so grow, learn, explore, and find and spread positivity wherever you go!

I’d love to hear your thoughts about this blog or others.

Many blessings, health, and happiness to you,

Joelle❤️